Things Are Not Always What They Seem
by Lady Shahd Khushrenada
Summary: ::CHAPTER 3 IS UP!:: What if lady Une knew about her two personalties before she got into that coma? What if Treize actually told her? who would she go to for an explanation? this fic centers on lady Une & Treize's relationship and how it effected her to the point she almost lost her sanity. MOVING TO DEVIANTART. Anyone trying to get to my fics can get them there.
1. Chapter 1

This is my very first fic to be published, I was actually very hesitated, weather to publish it or not, but here we are! I hope you enjoy it, as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Just a little note: English is not my native language, but I LOVE writing and reading in it so please if there were any grammar or dictation mistakes, please, be kind enough to tell me, but please no flames!

And please review!

THINGS ARE NOT ALWAYS WHAT THEY APPEAR

Une pressed her hand against the cold glass of the frozen December window, feeling the cold spreading through her white glove.

The sky was getting darker, and flecks of snow were falling turning everything they touched into white, it was Une's favorite time of year, when people everywhere got ready to go home to spend the holydays with their families, it was the most magical time of year, but not this year, not for her at least .

She thought about all that happened, about what she discovered in the past few days, she simply couldn't, she can't even believe it, how about accepting it?

"Ma'am? Are you OK?" a voice from behind called, she recognized it immediately, it was Nikol's, her second in command, the only one who knew her secret, or rather Trieze's secret for she just knew about it days ago .

"I'm fine, thanks" she replied realizing that the only one who could tell her about her double life was just behind her.

According to Trieze, Nikol was the one to help whenever one of her characters decides to appear; he always helped making it less shocking for her or for "both of them".

"Nikol ..." she said as she turned away from the window.

He paused, as he started to leave the room and turned back to face her.

He didn't say anything; he just looked at her with a puzzled excerption posted on his face.

She walked toward the nearest sofa, sat on it and nodded for him to set too, he did what he was told, as he realized that he had a pretty good idea about what she wanted, he heard roamers about what happened between her and treize, about the party they attended together and about her fainting there, he thought about the possibility that that happened because of her finding out the truth, but he tried to mistaken himself, and now it seems he was right, besides it's been a while sense Trieze asked him one of _his_favors .

Une wasn't sure what to say to the man that sat in front of her, she felt silly, she, one of the most powerful women in the world, can't ask a man who worked under her a question, how stupid! But it wasn't just a question, and she knew it, she knew it very well, and she _was_scared, she was even terrified, but she had to, she had to know, as much as it might hurt, she had to know who she was; what she did.

"Nikol .." she said again cutting the silence, but she had no idea how to continue, "his Excellency told me everything", she finished looking at his eyes, watching his puzzled excerption turning in to an understanding one, not a shocked one, but understanding, which meant he knew what she was talking about.

He lowered his head, "Lady Une, ma'am, I'm so sorry, but I was just doing his Excellency's orders, I ..." he began explaining.

"Nikol, I don't want an apology from you nor an explanation" she said in a low, composed voice, "Master Trieze told me what you did, you practically saved my life countless times!" she said with half a smile, "but I really want to know what I was like, I have to..." her voice broke but she managed, "in those planking moments that I lost control, I have to, please..." her voice broke again, but this time she couldn't continue, so she just turned her head away, hiding her tears.

Nikol didn't move, though he knew he probably should, he used to calm her down all the time, at least her peaceful character was an easy crier, easy to break down, but this time he didn't, he knew that that was her now, she was whole again, she was herself .

"I'll tell you everything, anything you want to know" he said when she finally turned her head back in his direction.

She smiled at him, not a happy one, but it was enough to make him more positive that he was right, the hard colonel and the peaceful woman are together again, united in one incredible woman, he felt relived for her, she was an amazing woman, and she defiantly didn't deserve to be in such pain, if it was in his hands before he would have told her, but it wasn't, and for some reason, Trieze didn't want her to know anything.

"How did it start?" she said in a low toned voice, as she stood up and walked towards the window, if she cries again, he won't be able to see her tears.

"It started two years ago, we were at the colonies, there was a peace conference there, that master Trieze was invited to, and we were ordered to stay at the hotel" he begun.

Une remembered that very well, of course they were "ordered" means that for one reason or another Trieze didn't want a military force there, but she doesn't remember anything after that, is it possible … ?

"My room was next to yours", he continued, "I heard a sound, it was really late, but the conference was still on, apparently Mr. Darline was there", he added with a mocking smile.

"I went out to the corridor, I thought it was one of the repels, you know they hated our guts there", she nodded, he continued, "but then, I saw you; you were all dressed, an amazing dress you were wearing! And your hear was perfectly done, you ..." he paused looking for the right word, "you were gorgeous!" he finally said.

Une smiled to her reflection on the now black frozen window, she knew he couldn't see her face, but she managed to see herself in that gown and her hair, deep down she knew for whom exactly she wanted to look pretty.

"You were walking toward the stairs," he said interrupting her thoughts, "you passed me as if you didn't know me! I called after you, but you didn't answer, then I walked after you and caught your arm, you turned smiling and said:" Were you talking to me?" I nodded and you laughed, "I'm sorry but I have no idea why you just called me colonel! My name is lady Une!"

I couldn't speak, and thought I was seeing things, then I remembered the voice I heard, then I knew I wasn't imagining, but at the same time it wasn't you, I couldn't explain it.

So I ignored what you said and told you about master Trieze's orders, you laughed again saying that they -his orders- were for soldiers, and that you weren't one".

He stopped talking:" Then what?" Une asked, turning into his direction, giving her back to the window.

He looked at her "nothing, I couldn't prevent you, after all you were my commander and I had no power on you, I tried to explain what I saw, but I couldn't, so I left to my room".

"Did I make it to the conference? Did you tell ..."

"His Excellency?" he said interrupting, she nodded.

"No, I just thought I should wait, for after you left with a couple of hours, I heard

footsteps, so I went out to check again"

"Was it me?" she asked trying to control her voice, she couldn't remember any of that!

He nodded, "Yes, but you were kind of unconscious".

"Unconscious?"

"Yes, his Excellency was carrying you in his arms, you were murmuring something, and he was heading to his room, his face! God! I can remember his facial excerption till this second!" he paused for a while; she waited for him to talk for she didn't want to know, Trieze definitely was angry with her, "Heh! A crazy woman coming to impairs him, in a peace conference, Oh my God! What have I done there? How humiliating!" she thought.

"How was it? His face, I mean" Une couldn't pair the silence any longer.

"He was ... he was kind of hurt" he said in a surprised tune, as if she should know that already, but then added:" no not hurt... but in deep pain, it was like someone he loves had just died!" Une was surprised, Trieze wasn't angry with her?

"But he didn't say anything," Nikol added when she didn't comment, "he just walked directly to his room, and got out like minutes later, and summoned me, he asked what happened, I told him everything I saw, he didn't get angry on me, as I expected, but he ordered me to get some mades for you, he said that you were at his room, and ordered me to prevent anyone from getting in there, I obeyed, I got the mades almost immediately, and for days no one, not even me, was allowed to go into his Excellency's room, no one but the mades and himself".

At this point, Une was completely lost, she had no idea what he was talking about, it was as if he was talking about someone else's life, not hers, her? Unconscious for days? She had absolutely no memory whatsoever of what he was saying.

"Then what?" Une rushed him; she didn't want to think about it, she might get mad! She had to know everything first.

"Then we came back to earth, and afterwards, your attitude started to get a little strange"

"Strange?"

"Yes, you started to be like you didn't feel anything, like.." he stopped again, of fear this time she guessed, so she finished it for him :"like a killing machine?" she said smiling, but he didn't, he actually looked shocked, "don't worry, I didn't switch, it's still me" a weird laugh came out of her throat at his excerption, it was more of a choking voice, as if she had forgotten how to laugh, then added, "I can remember a few things I did," she lied, she already knew that, from treize.

He nodded still shocked of her reaction, "after a few months, his Excellency summoned me to his office again" he finished, "he..."

"He ordered you to watch me," she said, it was not a question, it was a fact, if she knew anything about Trieze, it would be this, he wouldn't let anyone, even her, destroy his plans.

"No," Nikol said, and this time it was her turn to get shocked, "he asked me watch _over_you! He wanted to make sure were OK" He said as Une's mouth dropped open unbelieving, he actually did that for her?

"He was so worried, though trying not to show it, it was so obvious, he told me everything, about your two characters, about how I can tell if it wasn't you, how they could appear any second, and how that would hurt you, how it might even kill you, if one of them decides to appear in, let's say a fight or something!" his tune got less sharp as he continued, "of course, he ordered me not to tell a soul about it, especially not you," then he added after a minute :"he even told me to guard you with my life," even if the whole organization was at stake, put her life first" he said".

Une couldn't speak then, her voice disappeared; all this time she thought that he kept it away from her for his interest; he was actually trying to protect her!

...

Please, please, please review!

Tell me if you liked this fic because I might add a few chapters to it, it depends on your opinion; just tell me what you think.


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: I think I need this, so I don't own gundam wings._

_A\N: this story takes place in an alternative reality, so some of the original events might have been altered; it's just the way I wish things would have worked for Treize & lady Une._

_Now, enough with this, on with the fic: enjoy ^_^_

_**Chapter 2**_

I was so scared. For the first time in my life, I felt so weak. Me, lady Une, the woman who men feared before women. How ironic!

I was in my office. It was getting darker by minute, but I didn't feel the need to get the lights on. I sat by the window, watching guards switching shifts, the ones who left were extremely happy; they were going to their homes, to their families. I had no one to go to, so I decided to stay in my office for another night. Yet I felt so empty. But I knew it was the price I had to pay to be with him, and something deep inside told me it was worth it.

I've never actually liked the war. At least not in the way he did. I only joined the military to fulfill my dreams, to get myself free of the cold chains of aristocratic rules. I hated them, though I was born in a wealthy noble family, I've never liked the dresses or the shoes that I was never able to walk in, or the way that girls had to act shy and blush whenever a man tries to talk to them, only to get themselves a husband.

My mother; Katherine Wentworth, hated these rules too. When she was sixteen, she fell in love with my father, John Clair; a young officer that couldn't provide her half the price of the dress she wore to sleep! But she didn't care, she just loved him. I guess love does that, it makes you do stupid things just to be with the one you love. I had never believed it before, till I met Treize of course, but that happened later. Then I used to think that my mother was naive to even think that love was worth anything.

My mother ran away with my father. They got married, after six months my grandfather managed to bring her back, but then I was there already; my mother was pregnant.

My grandfather got mad of course, made my father divorce her, and disappear completely from her life and mine. Six months later, I was born.

I was named Kathy-Une Wentworth, my mother's name and one in French, meaning the only Kathy, and of course my mother's last name. My grandfather told everyone that I was my dead uncle's daughter that was killed in battle. He didn't tell anyone about the true story, even I knew about it when I was almost fourteen and from my grandmother, who made me swear not to tell my grandfather that I knew.

Unfortunately, my mother didn't survive the delivery, and I was left to be raised by my grandfather; I loved him. He was my whole family, and used to call me his precious angel. I guess he regretted what happened to my mother and didn't want it to happen again, so he gave me everything a girl could ask for. He had never said no to any request of mine, but unluckily, that was not enough for me to like that life. In fact, I hated it, it was all stupid to me, and when I got sixteen I ran away to the military academy on Lake Victoria.

Of course my grandfather got crazy at me; I guess he thought that my mother's story was going to be repeated all over again. But I wasn't as stupid as my mother, I didn't ran away to be with a guy, I ran away to get my freedom.

My grandfather couldn't get to me, I was nowhere to be found, and then I was accepted there. I wrote hundreds of letters to him but never got an answer. It broke my heart, but I knew it was worth it, because it was then that I discovered the true me. It was then that I knew for certain that I wasn't meant to wear dresses and act stupid to impress men. In fact I discovered that I didn't have to impress them, or anyone for that matter. Instead I made people fear me, and I liked that, the feeling of control; of power. I wanted more, so I worked hard, I studied and never made friends, I wanted to be the best, and I did everything I could to get it.

I graduated in three years instead of the usual four, I had high recommendations. I could have worked anywhere, or at least that was what I thought, for after I left the academy and received my nomination, I was shocked, I was to be working in a paper work, an aide for some Colonel, and for the first time in my life I heard the name; Treize Khushrenada.

I was so depressed the day that I needed to start there. I thought about resigning, but then the fact that I had nowhere to go struck me; I couldn't possibly go back to my grandfather, so I decided that I'd do my best to get transported as fast as possible.

I was in his office six am sharp that day, I didn't expect to find anyone there, so I thought I might just discover a little bit.

It was a cold December day, much like this one. I still remember the details till this second, I went inside the building, got to his office, and opened the door. I didn't even bother to knock for I thought no one would be there, but he was.

He was sitting there, behind his large desk, drinking tea, holding the cup in a very aristocratic way that, instantly, reminded me of my grandfather.

"Quite early for your first day, I see" his voice struck me. He was reading through some papers on his desk, and a large plate filled with red roses right in front of him, blood red, they were very beautiful, I couldn't take my eye of them.

He didn't even bother looking at me. I froze in place, I couldn't answer, and I just kept looking at him, and looking back now I think I fell in love with him that very instant.

"He is so handsome, for a Colonel, or for anyone for that matter," I remember that that thought crossed my mind before anything else.

"Lieutenant Kathy-Une Wentworth reporting for duty, sir" I said saluting him, he didn't raise his head; he just saluted me with a little wave. "How arrogant!" I remember thinking.

"Please, be kind enough to take a seat," he said pointing to a chair by his desk.

I remember approaching him, sitting where he said, and thinking about how I was exactly going to endure my days in his service. "He's such an arrogant aristocratic!" I remember telling myself. I knew a few men in the academy like that, rich with a good last name, thinking that they were the best of all just because of their last names.

Little did I know!

"What was your name again?" he finally said raising his head for the first time, looking at me.

"Lieutenant Kathy-Une Wentworth, sir" I repeated. Heat coming up to my face under his icy blue eyes gaze, I was blushing! What was wrong with me?

"Such a long name!" he said getting his head back to his paper. "I shall call you Une, it would be more suitable since you are going to be my one for everything, and shorter of course."

I didn't know what to say, it was the first time anyone ever call me Une. But I liked it, and somehow his way of saying "my one" made me blush again.

Our little conversation didn't get anymore interesting. He just told me everything I needed to do for him, and it was then that I realized that working for Treize Khushrenada was anything but just paper work.

I learned his habits with time, and everything he liked, even the little things about him, like his favorite tea, which hour he liked to drink it. I even used to bring him his roses to the office every morning.

I've been working for him for five years now, if anyone told me, back then, I'd be still working in the same place after five years I would have gone crazy, but I did, and it was all for him. I let go of my dreams to work in actual fights, and stayed with him. I would have done anything he wanted me to do, and still would. But in return, he gave me what I wanted too; power. I was practically his second in command, and everyone would obey if I ordered, they feared me. Master Treize had buried Kathy Wentworth, and lady Une was born on his hands. Kathy Wentworth was no one, lady Une was everyone.

I don't know when exactly I discovered that I loved him, but I knew very well that I did, and will forever do. I loved him with all my heart, I loved everything about him, I didn't care -and still don't- about what other people thought of my loyalty to him. I just wanted to make him happy, so my job for him became my life.

I don't recall that master Treize had ever stopped working. He loved his work more than anything. He gave it all of his time, and I gave him all of mine, whatever he wanted I did, without questioning. I don't remember disobeying any order he gave me, ever. But I did that for him, I know it now more than ever, I did all of that for him, and I would still do it.

I wasn't like that my whole life though, I've never believed in war, or have never actually thought about it as a fact, but for him I did.

But it all changed a few days ago.

I was supposed to go with him to some party. I used to escort him everywhere, but this time he asked me to go with him. He actually told me that he wanted me to go as his date, he even asked me to wear a dress and get my hair done.

I was so surprised. Master Treize had never done that, but as usual I didn't argue, I did what he asked and prepared myself to go with him -and for the first time- as a civilian.

As I got ready, I felt like a teenager going to her first date. I even laughed at my reflection in the mirror when I finished doing my hair, I felt a little silly but I liked it. "I don't know what might master Treize aim is of this, but I can at least enjoy it." I remember telling myself as I waited for him to arrive.

He insisted that I ride in his limo with him. I used to ride with him all the time, but never when he goes to a party or a conference, then I would just be there before he arrives.

The limo arrived on time. I got in; I found it a lot harder to get into a car with a dress on. I even heard him laughing at my site, trying to push the dress inside. He helped me, still laughing. I don't remember hearing him laughing so hard before, but I liked it, anything that would make him happy would suit me as well.

When I finally managed to get in. He stopped laughing and took my hand kissing it. I felt the hair on my neck standing when he did. I even blushed as he looked into my eyes. In my years working for him I managed to get used to his icy blue eyes, not exactly used to, but at least managed to hide their effect on me, but this time I couldn't.

"You look absolutely beautiful, my lady." he whispered, still gazing at me.

I couldn't reply, instead I just tried to free myself from his eyes by looking down. I blushed again! Oh my God! _I'm _acting like a teenage girl!

He smiled at me, and freed me of his gaze, but didn't let go of my hand. I found myself letting go of a breath I was holding, but I didn't dare pulling my hand out of his grip.

We arrived at the party. And for the first time in my life I was treated as a lady rather than a solder. No one recognized me, Treize introduced me as just lady Une to everyone, still holding my hand and not letting go. I felt like I got back seventeen again, to my grandfather's parties, and to the rules I had to put on, but this time I wanted to, or might even liked it. I liked the fact that I -for once- would be able to act as any other woman would act around a man she really liked or, in my case, loved.

Treize danced with me. I felt like we were flying, I felt like he actually wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him. It was like living in my own fairytale, he was my prince and I, and for once in my life, got to be a princess.

I don't remember feeling him so close before. And whatever was in my mind that second, it vaporized! Right then the most important thing to me was how to hide the effect of his eyes on me, after a second I gave it up, if this wasn't real to him, let it be at least for me.

After we danced, he told me that he wanted to talk to me alone. I followed him. I knew that by this my fairytale would be over. He was probably going to tell me why he asked me to dress like that, and the purpose of me coming with him.

I walked along till we reached a balcony somewhere, it was directly on the sea; I even managed to feel drops of the salty water on my face.

I waited for him to talk, but he didn't say anything, so I stayed silent as well. I was used to his habits by then. So instead of taking I turned towards the sky and looked, "Oh my God!" I whispered. The view from where we stood was incredible, the sea and the sky. Nothing more beautiful. Nothing more perfect. The sea had always fascinated me; maybe because I was born and raised in a restricted family that I had never been able to enjoy things as normal people did. Anyway I had always liked it, the sand ... the sound of the waves ... even the smell of the air ... it was simply perfect!

"Can I daresay that you liked the sea?" I heard him saying. I smiled in response to his question, and blushed yet again. What's gotten into me tonight?

When I didn't respond, he didn't add anything. He just approached and stood next to me and said as if talking to himself :"I've forgotten how nice to feel the air of the sea on my face," then added "It's calm tonight ... I hate to see it so violent" .

I looked with him. Even though I couldn't see anything, the man who stood beside me made me forget even how to breathe. I had forgotten how sweet he gets when he talks. I had noticed that from my day one with him, he had that ability to charm you with his words. Even when he gives speeches he does that to people.

After a few seconds, I tried to observe the sea with him. The sound of the waves made me calm down. And suddenly a voice in my head told me that everything was going to be OK. It wasn't just the sound of the sea that made me calm like that. Deep down I knew it, it was simply the feeling of him so close. His presence had always made me believe that nothing will go wrong. And that I was safe, as long as I was by his side, I'll always be safe. Oh what am I thinking? I can't let my thoughts go that way; it will end up hurting me. And I can't take any pain right now. He can't possibly feel that way towards me, can he?

After quit a time I felt the gentle touch of his finger under my chin. He turned my face towards his; he didn't stop till there were a few inches between our faces. I was so surprised by him that I didn't even resist, I just obeyed. Then he just moved his hand and gently brushed my cheek with the back of his fingers.

"Oh my dear lady," he said in a whisper. His voice was filled with despair, as he moved a piece of hair that had fallen across my face, I could swear my heart skipped a few beats upon his touch.

"Are you ok, Your Excellency?" I asked in whisper as well, worried that he might be in some kind of pain.

"There's something you need to know", he said then as he lowered his hand, and turned his eyes to words the sea, his words still filled with despair.

It was then that I knew everything. He told me about what happened to me, about my other two personalities. I don't know why I believed him, why didn't I feel at least shocked? Why didn't I deny it like any other normal person would have? May be deep inside I knew it; I knew that something was wrong with me. So I just screamed at his face, for the first time in my life I did that. I was so angry, or rather so hurt. I felt like he betrayed me, like I was nothing to him.

My eyes got filled with tears as I was just screaming. I was crazy, and to make things even worse he didn't even try to stop me, or to tell me to behave myself. Instead he just held me in his arms, like a baby, and when I kept crying and hitting his chest with my fists, he held me tighter, and even though I was so mad, I managed to feel safe there, in his arms, my head resting on his wide chest. As he just bat my head with his hand.

I don't remember anything after that. Just that my anger turned to silent tears streaming down my face. And I started sweeping on his chest, and then everything went black.

When I opened my eyes, I was at the hospital. They told me that I fainted in the party, and was brought there by his Excellency, and that he left directly afterwards.

I didn't see his face since then. I hated him, I blamed him for everything. Though I didn't know the full story. I knew that it was all because of him.

I left after a couple of days; a letter came from him in the day I was supposed to be discharged in. It was not exactly a letter, but more of an order for me to leave to the colonies immediately. I did what I was told as usual, and there I asked Nichol to tell me more about who I was, and he did.

Of course, before I was discharged a psychiatric examined me, and said that the shock of me finding out had somehow cured me and there was a big chance that I was a normal person again. I didn't believe him at first, but I had no choice but to do so, and I went back to do my daily work for Treize. I didn't however; speak to him -in private at least- till now.

I regretted what I did. I knew it was his fault, but what he did to protect me afterwards made me realize how unfair I was to him. Nikol told me everything, I felt so scared of confronting him again. What if he decides to send me away? How would I ever be able to live without him?

I wake up of my day dream, realizing I was setting in the dark the whole time. I looked at my watch; it was almost eight. "Oh God! I've at least been here for two hours!" I said to myself in a low voice.

I was just getting up when someone opened the door. I instantly closed my eyes, the lights were very strong that I couldn't even see who was there till he spoke:"My lady! What are you doing alone in the dark?"

I blinked a few times until I managed to recognize the figure that stood in front of me, though I knew the voice already.

"Master Treize," I said after my eyes adjusted to the lights. I stood up looking at him with surprised eyes. I thought he was on his estate in Germany! What on earth was he doing here?!

"You seem rather surprised to see me," he said when I didn't reply. He wasn't angry; he was just stating a fact.

I didn't say anything as he got to the light switch and turned it on. He then came closer to me and sat on a chair opposite to where I sat earlier. "Une, Are you ok?" he said when my excerption didn't change. He didn't seem to recall what happened before I left, the fight we had on that party, or me screaming in his face for the first time in my life.

* * *

_I don't know if anyone reads this but if you do and you want me to write more please review, because I can really use some support. Anyway I have the 3rd chapter on paper and I will upload it, but for what happens later; I'm lost, so if anyone has any ideas, please tell me._

_Finally, forgive me for any grammar or dictation mistakes. _


	3. Chapter 3

_A\N: for those of you who was waiting for my update, I'm so, so sorry! I really got up in college stuff that I wasn't able to do anything but study! But I finally managed to find time to upload this. __Anyway, this chapter is not exactly what I intended for it to be, but, well, it never is :P . It's kind of a songfic, I didn't actually write the chapter with the song, I just heard it a few days ago and thought it matched with the plot, so I don't know :\ just tell me what you think, OK? ;)  
__  
Song: Words I couldn't say._

_Poem: A rose by Nuku Desmond._

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything!_

___Enjoy! ^_*_

* * *

_**Chapter 3**_

_In a book, in a box, in the closet_

_In a line in a song I once heard_

I felt the gentle wind on my face as I looked at the red roses in the garden, they looked so very beautiful. Their color reminded me of someone, someone I didn't know if I had lost forever or not, she loved those red roses as much as I loved them, or did she only to satisfy me? That I didn't know, but for me; those roses will always remind me of her.

Strings of red were just appearing in the eastern horizon; dawn was approaching, yet I didn't feel the need of going to bed, though I knew that that day was going to be exhausting, I just couldn't sleep; my mind was filled with all kind of thoughts, so I decided I'd rather get some fresh air, thinking it might get my head of things. But here I am, looking at these roses and remembering only her.

There were a poem that I used to love as a child; it was the reason that got me to be so in love with these roses in the first place… How did it start? Oh, yes:

_A rose to rise_

_A rose to fall_

_A rose to conquer all_

_Thorns that hurt_

_Thorns that protect_

_Thorns to start what cannot be stopped_

_One rose to say one word_

_One rose to say many words_

_Several roses to say nothing at all_

I had always loved this poem, though I haven't thought about it in years now, I don't remember where I heard it first, but it always held special significant to me. Roses can mean a lot of things; a black one means death, a white one for purity and a red one for passion and courage. It can say a million things, yet it can say nothing at all. How true that was…

How did it continue?

_From rise to fall_

_From hurt to protect_

_A rose is a rose_

_That can mean many things_

_But all depends on you_

_Your interpretation_

_Your perspective_

_Your own heart_

_With its own rose_

_Its own thorns_

_All depends on you_. Yes, it does. After all this time I discovered it does, it only depends on what you want it to mean, and now these red roses meant only her to me; seeing her face again, that was what they all meant for me.

_In a moment on a front porch late one June_

_In a breath inside a whisper beneath the moon_

Why would she have all that effect on me? So what if she had split personalities? Why do I feel the need to protect her like that? I watched soldiers die in battles the most horrible deaths and didn't flinch! Oh, who am I kidding? Une was not like any other soldier I knew, she was not like anyone I ever knew, she was ... she was something else; she moved things in me, things I thought I buried a long time ago.

It's true that I chose her very accurately of hundreds of other fresh soldiers that graduated from the academy, I knew the qualities I wanted in the one who was supposed to be by my side to fulfill my planes. I was so surprised when the computer got me a woman's photo. I repeated the search, and examined her file myself, it was no mistake; she had it all.

I remember the day she started working for me; she was in my office first thing in the morning, I had to work late the night before, and decided not to go home, so when she opened the door to my study, I was there.

I remember her face when she saluted me for the first time; she was clearly embarrassed and disappointed. Embarrassed for getting caught sneaking to the office of her superior in her first day, which I found very funny; I even suppressed a laugh at her sight. And disappointed –which I could easily know why- for after I read her file, I knew exactly how ambitious she was, and of course the news of her working as an aide must have been horrible for her, but she had no idea how that was going to be just a cover for the real job I needed her to do.

I remember how her face blushed when I looked her in the eye for the first time, I was used to that from women everywhere when I look at them, but I didn't from her. I had to admit that I was -at least at first- fooled by her hard façade, the façade she kept to hide the true her, the kind, beautiful and amazing her. She thought it was weakness, but I thought it was the most beautiful thing about her, and with time I discovered how fragile she was under those uniform and thick glasses of hers.

She was an amazing soldier too; I couldn't deny that either, she made everyone fear her. Only I knew the truth, every time I look her in the eye I see that, I see the kind and nice woman she tries very hard to hide.

_There it was at the tips of my fingers_

_There it was on the tip of my tongue _

But that wasn't what I couldn't understand, or wasn't what made me think about her the whole time, there was something about her, something that always got me drawn to her. I thought that I knew all kinds of soldiers, but that was until I met her, she was everything but ordinary, she had qualities, that even generals, who spent their entire lives in battles, lack, and a mind that no one's mind could even be compared to, and above it all, and with all her intelligence, she never argues with me, even if I refused a plane she spent months preparing, she would just obey, she'd do anything I ask, even if it could jeopardize her life, she'd still do it.

I don't deny that I took advantage of that at first; I used to give her all kind of missions, missions that even I was unsure how to accomplish, but she'd do it, no questions asked, I ordered her to kill Darline, I ordered her to make a plane to get rid of the Alliance's leaders, she did it all.

It wasn't long till it struck me in the face; I realized that I had feelings for her, I didn't know when that happened exactly, I just knew it, but I was determined not to let that get in the way, I knew what feelings could do, and I wasn't ready to risk it all for a woman.

I knew other women in my life of course, but they weren't anything like her, they were all over me because of my title and money, I was well aware of that, they thought that after giving me what I wanted I might full in love with them or even marry them, but that wasn't me, I knew what I wanted, and knew very well how I to get it, though I was welling to get some pleasures along the way, but that wasn't the case this time.

_There you were and I had never been that far_

_There it was the whole world raped inside my arms_

Une was different, she didn't even try to get closer to me, she kept her actions with me very professional. I don't even remember her ever removing those thick glasses of hers or even letting her hear down of those buns she kept tight to her head in my presence, and after all this time, she didn't even start calling me by my name, it was either "sir" or "your Excellency". Even if we were alone, which happened a lot, she'd never cross the line between us.

I remember when I discovered that my feelings for her weren't just feelings of desire, I remember it very well when I knew I loved her, that I will never be able to treat her as any other soldier, or even like any other woman for that matter, it was when I knew she was sick, and that I was the one who gave it to her.

_And I let all slip away..._

Two years ago, we went to a peace conference, I didn't want a military force with me there, though she came with me to the hotel, I went alone to that conference. Back then I had to put a good façade to the people of the colonies, so I left her there.

The conference went on to no end, that man Darline kept gabbling about peace and how it can't be accomplished without removing all weapons. _He doesn't understand the beauty of war; peace can't be accomplished without war_. That was the only thing that I wanted to tell him._ It's still early_. I told myself; _Soon all of them will realize that war is the price we have to pay to earn peace._

It was nearly the end of the conference, they had a sort of small party to the guests, and I was talking with some general. It was then when she came, she was... I didn't even know how to describe her, the word most incredible woman in the room didn't even start to cover it.

I didn't know her at first, she wasn't wearing her uniform, instead she wore an amazing long royal blue dress, and her heir was falling straight around her face reaching the middle of her back, it matched the dress perfectly, no glasses of course. It took me a while to realize that she was the same woman that worked for me for almost three years back then.

Men were all around her, from generals to politicians, trying to win her notice, but I remained far. _Another pretty woman men drooling over_. I thought, not realizing that pretty woman was only her.

When I discovered it was her, I froze, me, Trieze Khushrenada, surprised for the first, and probably the only time in my life, I had no idea what's gotten into her. At first, I thought it was one of her brilliant planes, but she'd never disobeyed me before, and I clearly ordered her to stay at the hotel.

A minute later, I decided to approach her, I asked for a dance, she accepted. I tried talking to her while dancing, and she didn't even sound like she was scared of disobeying me, on the contrary, she acted like she _was,_ it was then that I realized that something was really wrong with her.

_I have to take her away from here, now._ I remember thinking. Back then I would have explained my worry over her of fearing of her causing a scene, but now, I know that what I did was only of fear _for_ her, I knew I only _had_ to protect her, no matter what that might that cost me, I just knew I couldn't just stand there and watch her hurt herself.

I asked her to go with me, and surprisingly she accepted, she walked with me to the outside willingly, so I couldn't suppress it any longer, I just asked her why she left the hotel, she didn't seem worried about that, she didn't even try to answer my questions.

_There's a rain that'll never stop falling_

_There's a wall that I tried to take down_

She kept _talking_ to me, talking in the way that any other woman talked around me, and for a moment I doubted it was even her! But it was, she was only acting the way we both wanted to act around each other since the first time we met. And for the first time in my life, I wished I wasn't the leader of OZ, I wished that I would be like any other man who fell in love, I wished that I could go to the woman I love, and just tell her how I really felt, and may even be lucky enough to get a kiss, then leaving hoping for just another moment around her.

Sadly, those were just wishes, I was Trieze Khushrenada, and she was lady Une; my aide, so I fought that sudden urge to hold her in my arms and just take her home, instead I tried to confront her and to sound angry.

_What I should have said just wouldn't pass my lips..._

_So I held back and we've come to this_

"Une, what in the world are you doing? Have you forgotten who I _am_? Who _you_ _are_?" I remember saying very angrily, thinking that might somehow wake her up!

"What do you mean?" She then said smiling, ignoring my anger.

_That's it._ I thought, and then told her to control herself; it was the first time in my life to be scared for someone, so I acted unconsciously, for the first time in my life I allowed my feelings to control me, and I haven't regretted anything in my life more since then. But what happened next was the only thing I didn't expect; she started to deny it all, she started saying weird things about her never being a soldier and then started to walk away from me, like I might hurt her somehow. She looked very frightened and I froze in place, she just ran away from me.

When I remembered where I was, I started following her, and then she just passed out, she fill in my arms without a word.

_And it's too late now_

I didn't know what to do with her, I just held her in my arms. She was so beautiful and peaceful, I just wanted to hold her against my body like that forever, but the feeling of losing her was stronger than me, and I decided it was better taking her to the hotel; I had to know what happened to her.

All the way there, I held her in my arms, refusing to put her down, I was so scared of losing her, in that instant nothing mattered for me more; not the war not the whole earth, not anything, only her, and for the first time in my life, I knew that I was in love with her, I knew that my feelings for her were more than just desire, they were love.

When we finally arrived, I insisted on taking her up myself, I didn't want to put her in her room; instead I took her to mine. I put her there on the bed, letting her body rest on the sheets, my body screaming for me not to let go of hers. I watched her for minutes, laying there, the moon light hitting her face perfectly, with her dress lining the curves of her body so accurately, and suddenly the way she looked reminded me of an old fairytale my mother used to tell me as a child; _sleeping beauty_. But would this princess ever wake up upon the kiss of her prince? And will _I _ever worth being that prince?

I left after I checked she was safe, and went to see the only man who could tell me what happened. I asked him, but got nothing, he told me things I had already guessed, so I just dismissed him, ordering him to go get some mades for her.

I went outside, after I made sure no one would get into my room but the mades, I carefully told them what to do, and decided to get some fresh air to think about what happened, alone.

I started walking in the cool breeze, it felt so nice on my skin, as I headed as far from the hotel as possible, there were no need for a light, the moon light cleared my way.

I tried to put my thoughts together, if there was anything that got me to where I was back then; it was my ability to think rationally even in the most complicated situations, I always managed to find a way to solve things, and I desperately needed that ability then.

I couldn't get my head completely cleared, I only thought about her, I thought about how I could swear that my heart skipped a few beats when I realized that beautiful woman, who stole everyone's heart, was only her, my lady. _What is happening to me? Since when can't I control myself around a woman? Since when do I risk everything for anyone?_ Those questions jumped to my mind before anything, but I cleared them away, I knew that I loved her and that was enough, I can't –won't- be able to question it so I better leave it as it is.

She had never disobeyed me before, so why in the world would she come there tonight? Why would she change her appearance like that? She had never, in her three years working for me till then, even let her hair down around me, and now all of the blue she decided to get a new look?

No, if I had to be honest with myself, I could find an answer to all these questions, the only question I couldn't answer was; why would she deny her ever being a soldier? And why did she finally decide to act so informally around me?

Almost an hour passed with me trying to find answers to the questions that were screaming in my head but with no use, there were only one answer to all of this, but I didn't want to believe it, I heard about it before, I heard about people that had to suppress aspects of their personalities, especially among soldiers, and after quite a while, in one way or another, they develop another personalities to satisfy the needs they depressed, those personalities would appear in any second, putting their lives and other peoples' around them to danger.

I couldn't believe it, or rather didn't want to, but I had to think of that possibility, even though it seemed such a far theory back then, who knew it would all be true?

_I should have found a way to tell you how I felt_

_Now the only one I'm telling is myself_

We left to earth after I was positive that she came back to the old her, and once we got there I ordered some psychological doctors to examine her, without her knowledge of course, that was the only condition I put to them.

They examined her for more than three weeks, and every time I asked them, I prayed to God that she'd turn out to be ok, and that the whole thing would be in my imagination. Unfortunately, that didn't happen, they came back to me and told me what they discovered, I was right.

They told me everything they found out, but that was very few; they said that they would have known exactly what was wrong if I would just let them talk to her. All they could tell was that she must have had a great psychological shock that led to her being like this, and that she must have had that other personality, that showed that night, somewhere deep inside her but she couldn't suppress it any longer.

It wasn't long till I discovered that the personality she was acting upon as a soldier was another personality of hers as well, she was cold, heartless and would do anything to fulfill her mission no matter who might get in the way.

I also could see that the true Une I knew was somewhere between those two completely different people, sometimes, and only sometimes, she'd appear, I would know then, I used to guess when she was herself and when she was not, but that wasn't enough, I knew that I won't be around her the whole time.

The only thing that I was scared of was that she might loose control in a fight or something, then it would all be my fault, if something happened to her I wouldn't forgive myself, so I ordered Nikol, her second in command, to watch over her. I had no other choice; I couldn't tell her the truth and having her hating me forever. I knew I did that to her, if it wasn't for me, she would have never suppressed that aspect of herself, I knew that she only did that to satisfy me, and I knew I had to fix it myself.

Time passed without her getting better nor worse, it has been two years, and I still didn't have the courage to tell her, me, the man who ruled the world, couldn't tell the woman he loved the truth out of fear of losing her!

It was a cold night, very much like this, when I got the invitation to that party, they are rare nowadays, people are scared of war, so no one was brave enough to have one. I thought about the night I discovered my feelings for lady Une, as I held the invitation in my hands.

It was a party too when I had to witness the woman I loved losing her sanity for me. And then a completely crazy idea came to me, if she had that happen of a great emotional shock, what would another shock do to her? I tried to shake that thought away, but it kept coming back, I could actually have a chance of saving her.

Finally, I decided to go for it, I decided to give it a shot, what's the worse that could happen? Her finding out? She knows that something is wrong already; it won't be long till she discovers everything.

I kept thinking about the matter for more than an hour, and finally figured exactly how I was going to do everything.

"Lady, will you come to my office, please?" I said in the phone. A second passed and she opened the door.

"Sir, you asked for me?" she said.

"Yes," I nodded.

She looked at me, with wondering eyes, but didn't speak; she knew me more than anyone, so she didn't rush me.

"There's a party tonight," I began, she nodded, her eyes still filled with wonder.

"As you know, it's not for the military..." I begun, and this time she nodded, her look turning into understanding.

"Of course, sir. I'll manage an escort for you as fast as possible," she said, opining her chart writing.

"That won't be a problem," I said. She immediately looked up, the pen still in her fingers.

"I want _you _to be my escort".

"I'll be there for sure, sir" she added indifferent.

"No, I meant as a civilian, Une, as _my escort_," I said getting my head back to the paper in front of me, still observing her from the corner of my eyes; she blushed, I loved seeing the pink in her cheeks, "your Excellency..." She begun, but didn't continue.

"Is that going to be a problem?" I said raising my head, meeting her eyes for the first time since she got in the room, she looked really confused, blushing deeper, in a deep shade of red.

She shock her head "No, sir" she replied after she managed to go back to her formality, I lowered my head again.

"I think a dress will be more appropriate for you to wear. I'll arrive at your house at seven, so..." I looked at my watch, "So, I guess that leaves you with four hours to get ready," I said in a way trying to end the conversation, she understood, as she always did.

"Yes, sir" she finally said leaving.

When she closed the door I let go of a sigh, and relaxed on the chair, realizing that I was tensed the whole conversation.

I stayed at the office, doing nothing but watching the clock, and when it struck seven, I jumped ordering the driver to get the limo ready.

It wasn't long till I was at her house, she went down the stairs coming towards the limo, she looked stunning in a full length deep purple dress, with her hair falling in layers around her face and on her shoulders, she was simply marvelous; she had always looked beautiful to me, but this time she was breathtaking.

She approached the limo obviously unable to walk because of her shoes, I tried to suppress a laugh, but when she finally got to the door, her dress got stuck so she couldn't get in, I then let laugh get the best of me, I started to laugh really hard that I don't remember laughing like that my whole life! But she finally managed to get inside, with me helping of course.

She sat beside me, I looked at her, taking her hand in mine, kissing it and then I told her she looked beautiful, she blushed of course, but didn't say anything.

We arrived at the party after a couple of minutes, I didn't let go of her hand, and guided her in, she followed simply letting me lead the way.

Everything that happened later happened as I planned it, I told her everything, she was completely shocked of course; she screamed, tried to hit me, and then collapsed crying on my chest. I felt like her tears were cutting through me, I wanted her to scream at me, I wanted her to have her revenge on me.

I held her there for a minute, and she only collapsed between my arms, I sneaked out and took her right to the hospital this time, I couldn't risk taking her to her apartment and leaving her alone, this time I had to make sure she was OK.

I haven't seen her since then, I couldn't; she must be hating me now, and I don't blame her, I was the one that caused her all that pain, I was the one that took advantage of her. She _should _hate me; I was never even worth her love for me to begin with.

_What do I do now that you are gone?_

_No back up plane, no second chance _

_And no one else to blame_

It's been more than a week and a half since I last have seen her face, I missed her dearly, but I guess I still didn't have the courage to talk to her yet.

_Man up! You're the leader of one of the most feared organizations in the world and you can't tell the woman you love the truth about your feelings? _I ordered myself, I have to talk to her eventually; I can't go on not seeing her face to face.

_All I can hear in the silence that remains _

_Are the words I couldn't say _

I woke up of my thoughts realizing I was walking way too far in the lands surrounding the Khushrenada mansion. _I should go back. _I said to myself watching the sun rays spreading, I liked this time of day the best; the smell of the air in the morning gives everything a new taste.

I got to the door of the mansion, no one was up. I was walking towards my bedroom to change my clothes when an idea occurred to me.

_If I leave now, I should be at the colonies by evening._

* * *

_So, how was it? :D … I really hope you liked this chapter, as I said I'm not fully satisfied with it, so please if you can leave a review with what you think, I'll really appreciate it! _

_Sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes. _


End file.
